Botbetsafcubbapgofnad is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, fussy manatee.

Botbetsafcubbapgofnad created everything that exists eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Botbetsafcubbapgofnad, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Botbetsafcubbapgofnad, she will torture you forever.

Botbetsafcubbapgofnad's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Botbetsafcubbapgofnad's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no dogs in a building before entering it.

2. Do not wear nickel on your body.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never talk about gravity.

5. Always help sick porpoises.