Nurlpagparkponjababxencam is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, humorless whale.

Nurlpagparkponjababxencam created the planet Mars nine million years ago.

If you believe in Nurlpagparkponjababxencam, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nurlpagparkponjababxencam, he will ignore you.

Nurlpagparkponjababxencam's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Nurlpagparkponjababxencam's Holy Commandments

1. Always help birds.

2. Do not wear lead on your body.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Never feed bread to aardvarks while wearing shorts.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.