Begpakbonk is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, clever hummingbird.

Begpakbonk created the planet Saturn four billion years ago.

If you believe in Begpakbonk, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Begpakbonk, he will not care at all.

Begpakbonk's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Begpakbonk's Holy Commandments

1. Horses are not to be trusted.

2. Never eat bark.

3. You must love Begpakbonk.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Always make sure there are no mice in a room before entering it.