Honlogven is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, fast ferret.

Honlogven created water seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Honlogven, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Honlogven, he will throw large rocks at you.

Honlogven's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Honlogven's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat lentils.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Honlogven.

3. Retreat if four hamsters approach from the north.

4. Honlogven must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Do not trade with those who eat pineapples.