Litstanfeb is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, loving centaur.

Litstanfeb created dark energy five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Litstanfeb, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Litstanfeb, he will attempt to scare you with floods.

Litstanfeb's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Litstanfeb's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Always help ducks.

4. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

5. Run away from indigo voles, for they are unholy.