Flabbifcap is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, calm fly.

Flabbifcap created the Cigar Galaxy seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flabbifcap, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Flabbifcap, he will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Flabbifcap's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Flabbifcap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Do not laugh in public.

3. Erect a giant tin sculpture of Flabbifcap in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never hurt moths.

5. Never run near gulls.
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