Donbogont is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, selfish mink.

Donbogont created the Black Eye Galaxy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Donbogont, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Donbogont, he will turn you into a slug.

Donbogont's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Donbogont's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention bats.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Never think about special relativity near snakes while wearing black ear rings and balancing five nickel spheres on your legs.

4. Never go into red rooms.

5. Erect a giant silicon sculpture of Donbogont in the centre of the settlement.