Yatfidtab is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, proud lobster.

Yatfidtab created light three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yatfidtab, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Yatfidtab, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Yatfidtab's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Yatfidtab's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near ducks while wearing mauve boots and balancing nine zinc spheres on your head.

2. Retreat if six snakes approach from the east.

3. Do not drink water in cyan rooms.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not chop down trees.