Kopfotcab is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, all-powerful hippopotamus.

Kopfotcab created the cosmos six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kopfotcab, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Kopfotcab, she will attempt to scare you with hail.

Kopfotcab's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Kopfotcab's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured mites.

2. Never write about bacteria.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Never feed spinach to hamsters while wearing boots.

5. Do not hurt nematodes.