Babyogbaf is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, sage penguin.

Babyogbaf created the Whirlpool Galaxy seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Babyogbaf, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Babyogbaf, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Babyogbaf's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Babyogbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about archaea.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Never think about thermodynamics near grasshopers while wearing brown scarves and balancing five titanium spheres on your neck.

4. Do not wear fawn clothing.

5. Learn seven new languages a year.