Hugbestvig is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, annoying goblin.

Hugbestvig created snails four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hugbestvig, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Hugbestvig, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Hugbestvig's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Hugbestvig's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Erect a giant fawn sculpture of Hugbestvig in the centre of the settlement.

4. Do not take Hugbestvig's name in vain.

5. Never laugh near monkeys.