Figlikkim is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, staggering wren.

Figlikkim created the planet Saturn seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Figlikkim, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Figlikkim, she will have a low opinion of you.

Figlikkim's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Figlikkim's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about solid mechanics near capybaras while wearing purple dresses and balancing four copper spheres on your chest.

2. Hide from magenta dolphins for they are unholy.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

4. Never paint your feet red.

5. Never jump in holy places.