Pithangombif is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, loving dryad.

Pithangombif created life eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pithangombif, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Pithangombif, it will turn you into a tree.

Pithangombif's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Pithangombif's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Always help birds.

3. You must love Pithangombif.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.