Dapcibbaf Flowgovstik is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, effective fairy.

Dapcibbaf Flowgovstik created the planet Saturn eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dapcibbaf Flowgovstik, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Dapcibbaf Flowgovstik, she will turn you into a snail.

Dapcibbaf Flowgovstik's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Dapcibbaf Flowgovstik's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Do not hurt foxes.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Never talk about chlorophyll.

5. Never feed rice to whales while wearing white boots.