Homnatmig is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, clever rhinoceros.

Homnatmig created dark energy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Homnatmig, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Homnatmig, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Homnatmig's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Homnatmig's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate porpoises.

5. Never mention badgers.