Hinhandap is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, emotional mongoose.

Hinhandap created a bottom quark seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Hinhandap, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Hinhandap, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Hinhandap's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Hinhandap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear silicon on your body.

2. Do not dye your hair magenta.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Always obey Hinhandap's priests.