Pagarpcenlargdavfligbun is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, calm mole.

Pagarpcenlargdavfligbun created the cosmos five billion years ago.

If you believe in Pagarpcenlargdavfligbun, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Pagarpcenlargdavfligbun, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Pagarpcenlargdavfligbun's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Pagarpcenlargdavfligbun's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Pagarpcenlargdavfligbun.

2. Never feed lots of peanuts to monkeys while wearing pink stockings.

3. Always treat foxes with great respect.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate gulls.

5. Always wear purple.