Capparkflab is a god.

It takes the form of a small, pitiless faun.

Capparkflab created the Virgo Supercluster eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Capparkflab, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Capparkflab, it will refuse to believe in you.

Capparkflab's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Capparkflab's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Rats are not to be trusted.

3. Capparkflab loves birds, so they must be honoured.

4. Run away if six moths approach from the west.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate otters.