Rawzaktail is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, selfish grasshopper.

Rawzaktail created the planet Mars two billion years ago.

If you believe in Rawzaktail, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Rawzaktail, he will make you grow a tail.

Rawzaktail's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Rawzaktail's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about stars.

2. You must never eat cucumbers.

3. Run away from blue gulls, for they are unholy.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Always stare at clouds.