Jongebshav is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, thoughtless pig.

Jongebshav created oxygen four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jongebshav, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Jongebshav, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Jongebshav's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Jongebshav's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh near squirrels.

2. Always look after injured pigs.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Hide from red otters for they are unholy.