Sawmatkin is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, humane cow.

Sawmatkin created oxygen seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sawmatkin, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Sawmatkin, he will be very sad.

Sawmatkin's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Sawmatkin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep five ants in a large pit.

2. Never go into white rooms.

3. Retreat if nine snails approach from the south.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Do not drink alcohol.