Tofabaf is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, amazing lobster.

Tofabaf created the Tadpole Galaxy seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tofabaf, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Tofabaf, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Tofabaf's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Tofabaf's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the east.

2. Always obey Tofabaf's priests.

3. Never talk about electromagnetism near badgers while wearing brown trousers.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate snakes.

5. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Tofabaf on top of all buildings.