Larnbemcudbadjabflow Ganrillquatbep is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, idiotic elephant.

Larnbemcudbadjabflow Ganrillquatbep created vertebrates three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Larnbemcudbadjabflow Ganrillquatbep, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Larnbemcudbadjabflow Ganrillquatbep, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Larnbemcudbadjabflow Ganrillquatbep's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Larnbemcudbadjabflow Ganrillquatbep's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Never look at comets.

3. Never talk about galaxies.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of aluminium.

5. Respect your elders.