Stikyatmif is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, passionate capybara.

Stikyatmif created the universe nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Stikyatmif, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Stikyatmif, it will turn you into a duck.

Stikyatmif's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Stikyatmif's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Stikyatmif on top of all buildings.

4. Never think about nebulae.

5. Retreat if four horses approach from the east.