Dogcumwanloop is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, slow goblin.

Dogcumwanloop created the Small Magellanic Cloud three million years ago.

If you believe in Dogcumwanloop, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Dogcumwanloop, she will turn you into a tree.

Dogcumwanloop's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Dogcumwanloop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt manatees.

2. Do not eat oranges.

3. Retreat if nine birds approach from the west.

4. Never think about ribonucleic acid.

5. Always obey Dogcumwanloop's priests.