Fidjamtin is a god.

It takes the form of a large, bad-tempered crow.

Fidjamtin created gold two billion years ago.

If you believe in Fidjamtin, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Fidjamtin, it will turn you into a slug.

Fidjamtin's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Fidjamtin's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about planets.

2. Always help sick monkeys.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Erect seven tin sculptures of Fidjamtin on top of important buildings.

5. Always take life seriously.