Bigcisslib Getgednul Mandavpad is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, awesome clam.

Bigcisslib Getgednul Mandavpad created carbon eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bigcisslib Getgednul Mandavpad, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Bigcisslib Getgednul Mandavpad, he will destroy your favourite star.

Bigcisslib Getgednul Mandavpad's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Bigcisslib Getgednul Mandavpad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Do not sing in public.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate manatees.

4. Hamsters are not to be trusted.

5. Never feed peas to horses while wearing white ear rings.