Satcudjat is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, sage camel.

Satcudjat created Europe four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Satcudjat, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Satcudjat, it will denounce you as a heretic.

Satcudjat's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Satcudjat's Holy Commandments

1. Satcudjat loves squirrels, so they must be honoured.

2. Erect five tin sculptures of Satcudjat on top of important buildings.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Never think about eukaryotes.

5. You must pray to Satcudjat eight times a day.