Lopstrag is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, self-assured dolphin.

Lopstrag created the planet Jupiter four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lopstrag, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Lopstrag, she will throw large rocks at you.

Lopstrag's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Lopstrag's Holy Commandments

1. Lopstrag loves nematodes, so they must be honoured.

2. Never think about quantum mechanics.

3. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place in purple.

4. Always wear gray.

5. Never eat green fruit.