Wadsawved is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, unthoughtful goblin.

Wadsawved created snails six million years ago.

If you believe in Wadsawved, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Wadsawved, it will turn you into a mole.

Wadsawved's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Wadsawved's Holy Commandments

1. Always help manatees in need.

2. Run away if three nematodes approach from the east.

3. You must love Wadsawved.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Never skip near tapirs.