Flancarwig is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, awe-inspiring bee.

Flancarwig created a strange quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flancarwig, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Flancarwig, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Flancarwig's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Flancarwig's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in gray.

2. Hide from yellow foxes for they are unholy.

3. Never think about the strong nuclear force near goats while wearing black ear rings and balancing nine gold spheres on your legs.

4. Never go into red rooms.

5. Respect your elders.