Jigtenbod Bapfatquim Gedkadcum is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, ruthless gnu.

Jigtenbod Bapfatquim Gedkadcum created the solar system six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jigtenbod Bapfatquim Gedkadcum, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Jigtenbod Bapfatquim Gedkadcum, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Jigtenbod Bapfatquim Gedkadcum's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Jigtenbod Bapfatquim Gedkadcum's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dark matter near mice while wearing cyan shirts.

2. Never write about gravity.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.