Gofmotlarn is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, idiotic hydra.

Gofmotlarn created everything that exists nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gofmotlarn, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Gofmotlarn, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Gofmotlarn's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Gofmotlarn's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Gofmotlarn.

2. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gofmotlarn.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Always make sure there are no turtles in a building before entering it.