Dissakjab is a god.
He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, all-knowing
spider.
Dissakjab created viruses four billion years ago.
If you believe in
Dissakjab, he will grant you immortality.
If you do not believe in
Dissakjab, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.
Dissakjab's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.
Dissakjab's Holy Commandments1. Worship no other gods but Dissakjab.
2. Erect a giant tin sculpture of Dissakjab in the centre of the settlement.
3. Feed all hungry squirrels.
4. Never think ill of sick ants.
5. Never feed beans to goats while wearing jumpers.