Yikqueegkarlist is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, deceitful wombat.

Yikqueegkarlist created gold four billion years ago.

If you believe in Yikqueegkarlist, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Yikqueegkarlist, he will try to impress you with rainbows.

Yikqueegkarlist's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Yikqueegkarlist's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Never bounce in the presence of goats.

5. Never think ill of sick swans.