Cimtipbarn is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, emotional capybara.

Cimtipbarn created an atom three billion years ago.

If you believe in Cimtipbarn, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Cimtipbarn, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Cimtipbarn's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Cimtipbarn's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at black holes.

2. Do not hop in public.

3. Never think about asteroids.

4. Feed all hungry mites.

5. Never feed lots of grapes to pigs while wearing black dresses.