Funpinfebman is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, ruthless clam.

Funpinfebman created light four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Funpinfebman, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Funpinfebman, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Funpinfebman's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Funpinfebman's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear cyan.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Erect a giant indigo sculpture of Funpinfebman in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never write about asteroids.

5. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.