Cetsogtom is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, annoying hamster.

Cetsogtom created a quark four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cetsogtom, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Cetsogtom, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Cetsogtom's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Cetsogtom's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about hamsters.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. You must pray to Cetsogtom seven times a day.

5. Put Cetsogtom first in all things.