Ladsabmantab is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, witty faun.

Ladsabmantab created the cosmos twelve years ago.

If you believe in Ladsabmantab, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Ladsabmantab, it will refuse to believe in you.

Ladsabmantab's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Ladsabmantab's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate mites.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Ladsabmantab.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Erect three carbon sculptures of Ladsabmantab on top of important buildings.

5. Do not eat rice.