Vadgarfas is a god.

He takes the form of a large, grumpy crane.

Vadgarfas created Asia seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vadgarfas, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Vadgarfas, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Vadgarfas' most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Vadgarfas' Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate birds.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Vadgarfas.

4. Worship no other gods but Vadgarfas.

5. Never wear black scarves.