Sugvadbudtinmininggarmin is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, passionate beaver.

Sugvadbudtinmininggarmin created a top quark two billion years ago.

If you believe in Sugvadbudtinmininggarmin, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Sugvadbudtinmininggarmin, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Sugvadbudtinmininggarmin's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Sugvadbudtinmininggarmin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about gooseberries.

2. Never eat turnips.

3. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Run away from yellow dogs, for they are unholy.

5. Do not covet oxen.