Ladpigdap is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, uncaring salamander.

Ladpigdap created dark matter five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ladpigdap, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Ladpigdap, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Ladpigdap's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Ladpigdap's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Ladpigdap.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Never chant near bats.