Bestxinjatzagflowdubwan is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, omnipotent penguin.

Bestxinjatzagflowdubwan created the planet Saturn two million years ago.

If you believe in Bestxinjatzagflowdubwan, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bestxinjatzagflowdubwan, she will turn you into a rock.

Bestxinjatzagflowdubwan's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Bestxinjatzagflowdubwan's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Always look after injured rats.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Bestxinjatzagflowdubwan.

4. Run away from cyan hamsters, for they are unholy.

5. Do not kill sheep.