Mabbarnyog is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, egotistical eagle.

Mabbarnyog created energy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Mabbarnyog, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Mabbarnyog, it will jump up and down on your head.

Mabbarnyog's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Mabbarnyog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Do not take Mabbarnyog's name in vain.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.