Genzedstik is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, conceited jellyfish.

Genzedstik created the Small Magellanic Cloud three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Genzedstik, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Genzedstik, he will turn you into a goat.

Genzedstik's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Genzedstik's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

2. Do not hurt gulls.

3. Hide if eight great tits approach from the south.

4. Always help snakes in need.

5. Never think about optics near snails while wearing green corsets and balancing five silicon spheres on your arms.