Zigvolbeg is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, selfish narwhal.

Zigvolbeg created a top quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Zigvolbeg, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Zigvolbeg, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Zigvolbeg's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Zigvolbeg's Holy Commandments

1. Always help nematodes in need.

2. Never feed beans to aardvarks while wearing trousers.

3. Run away if six goats approach from the north.

4. Do not wear nickel on your body.

5. Hide from orange doves for they are unholy.