Damdissfit is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, egotistical penguin.

Damdissfit created everything that exists two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Damdissfit, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Damdissfit, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Damdissfit's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Damdissfit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Do not speak about gooseberries.

3. Never write about solid mechanics.

4. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.