Satcut is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, uncaring whale.

Satcut created Europe four million years ago.

If you believe in Satcut, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Satcut, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Satcut's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Satcut's Holy Commandments

1. Satcut must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Never talk about solid mechanics near otters while wearing cyan corsets.

5. Always help mites.