Fasjanlog is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, fast ant.

Fasjanlog created humankind three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fasjanlog, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Fasjanlog, it will send minions to preach to you.

Fasjanlog's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Fasjanlog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Fasjanlog.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate ducks.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Never think about quantum gravity.