Lantonkman is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, ill-tempered wombat.

Lantonkman created vertebrates three billion years ago.

If you believe in Lantonkman, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Lantonkman, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Lantonkman's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Lantonkman's Holy Commandments

1. Never sprint in the presence of eagles.

2. Always make sure there are no whales in a room before entering it.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. You must love Lantonkman.

5. Always make sure there are no foxes in a building before entering it.